This
semester I have become a branded man. The CRS says so. I am now consigned to a
special penal colony called MLL 203. Fortunately for me, I am in good company.
One
is a recidivist whose harrowing experiences in two MLL penal colonies have
recently caused his adrenalin bursting, sending his academic juices to the
heavenly heights, and gaining inspiration to write a rumored 800-page memoir
which is now under review by the high chief of penology, the great DLT himself
who is on furlough in the Amazon hacking his way to the Temple of Tomes.
With such a distinguished career in gaol (no, friends in Alab, that
doesn't sound like "sheol," but "jail"), and being a
hulking balbas sarado, he could be easily mistaken as the prison mayor,
but no. He had suggested that I take the position by virtue of seniority,
which, of course, gave me unceasing fear and trembling being a newbie in the
penal business.
Then,
as if, on cue, some jailbird swinging from grapevine to grapevine whispered to
me that the selda mayor is actually a she-who-knows-me who certainly cannot be
named except for her initials, K.W. But for now she has to manage the cell via
remote control as she has been granted parole for some junket abroad.
We
share the cell with five other inmates. Two of them are members of the Literati
whose collective pledge is to not withhold secrets. Three others are also
first-time jailbirds who were initially uneasy ala Glaspell's canary.
A
media practitioner also happens to be part of the gang. Being with a giant TV
network, he is sure to keep tabs on any human and non-human interest story
swirling in the cell and around its immediate vicinity. It would make it double
hard, however, to hatch an escape plan ala Shawshank
Redemption because this otherwise amiable broadcaster would have broken the
details to Imbestigador before we could even begin chipping away bits of cement
on the wall.
The
warden? Well, he is fresh from his intermittent tour of duty in Diliman
where he earned his fourth star, PhD in Philippine Studies. And being known as
a church guy, he might just do a good job in this attempt at reforming us
sinner-scholars and save us yet from the hands of the angry gods and goddesses.
But pastor or no pastor, who knows what he will do should he find us
beyond redemption. For hell hath no fury like a warden scorned. (sms)
